'Ot!

Twice I reflected, wrote and dedicated a song for my father but never mentioned about my mother except about Mary, the mother of Jesus, a typical Jew, a faithful, simple, humble and modest woman of her time. I am impelled to write about my own mother when I found that a mother, who is trying to balance her motherhood, being a wife and a student, was able to come across my reflections.

Maybe it’s one of my difficulties to express my views about my mother; maybe because she is still alive. I admire those people who can always talk with their mothers as friends, as listeners full of wisdom for their kids. My mother was a woman who always looked after our needs as kids. We are only two siblings and I can’t remember that we became burden for her. Except one experience with her that I felt guilty of making her cried. One morning, I was mixing my coffee with milk and I looked for sugar and found none. In her presence, I poured the mug of milk in the sink and she started crying silently and talked how she labored to buy our needs and yet I just poured it. How pity I was that I was not able to recognize her love for me quickly. That experience I had, taught me a lesson to respect her and adore her motherhood. Of course I was unaware how she labored in giving birth to give me chance to live through her nine months of pregnancy. Yet that was another time when mixed feeling dominated her; great joy of having me as her first child and sadness for not knowing what future I can have in this world. She’s been there guiding me and taking care of me, how fortunate I am. Maybe this reflection is focused with greetfulness not only to her but also to all mothers who experienced the same, or maybe to the children who experienced same things like mine, during those times we neglected our mothers or not even recognized their simple presence, when they tried to understand us as kids, who seems unaware of the world’s messages for us.

Today in the Gospel, one of the verses talks about honoring the father and the mother as one of the greatest commandment. And this again reminded me about my mother. Yet on other side, I also feel sad for some mothers who unknowingly abuse their children physically and so on. When I was still in one of the settlement areas here in Metro Manila, I witnessed how a mother spanked her two-year old daughter, she is the same child who asked her mother if I’m her father. I’m sure, it’s not the only case I may encounter in the future, I just need to open eyes to the reality of families especially to those families who unconciously promote violence in many little ways. I believe in discipline, but on how a child is disciplined matters most. As Saint Marcellin says, “In order to teach a child, you must first love him or her.” That’s a challenge then…

With this reflection, I am also amused with Kim’s simple theological reflection how every individual becomes a mother ; and I’m not exempted to beome amother! True, he was speaking in our Theology class about motherhood, of giving birth to the presence of Christ to other people, giving flesh once again, the Christ in us. Jesus said, “Do this in memory of me” and I understand it as, life lived, broken and shared, like Jesus’. And that’s how a person of faith can give birth to Jesus. More about this next time.