Forgiveness
One of my unfinished business or ongoing business rather, is as one of the facilitators for the Reconciliation in our community. We discussed the steps and motivations of having this one and we found out how difficult it is to reason out why we need this. The senior brothers would be leaving soon and we need this reconciliation. Perhaps, it was easy for us yesterday to rationalize the things we want to happen during the activity. But for sure, it seems to be difficult for those who do not really know how to faciliate, and that’s my difficulty. One of the motivations why we will be having this is to have a closer relationship with one another. It is a virtue for us all. Forgiving is part of the activity. But how about for those who have the difficulty to forgive? Let us say, I’m one of them. For me, it is always not a good idea, because sometimes, I have the notion that it is a weakness, even accpetance of the wrong done which makes the person who offended me do the same misdeeds. It’s not easy, I should say. In my mind, I really wanted to forgive, it’s a real act of forgiving. But how about the heart? It is letting go of bitterness yet it takes time, preparedness is what I need. I may have forgiven the person who offended me, but still need some time to regain peace in my heart. I expressed my unpreparedness for confrontation yesterday with a friend and I realized that it’s not only me who is hurt. On the process, I may have hurt the other people, too. And they long for my humble effort to ask for forgiveness, the same thing I’m asking from other people… To add with, it’s difficult to forgive and forget. It seems that it’s not the good way to forgive. It would be a denial in my part if I try to forget. I might fail to face the trauma and hurt if I will try to erase my bad experiences from my mind. Rather, I’m resolved to make them as starting point for new life. It’s not walking backward but forward to the new beginning. Forgiving is acting for the future than wiping out the past. I appreciate reading and being enlightened by Bonnieq about her life’s past of how she forgave and forgives. One thing I’m sure, she found the right time and the right person whom she can trust more than her own: Loving, compassionate and merciful God: the One I’m always trying to be with.
sasha said:
Mabilis ako magpatawad, Vince. One smile, a good memory, a silent prayer.. parang okay na ako agad. Siguro din kasi mababaw lang yung ibang mga nangyari… or makakalimutin lang talaga ako
Seriously, I just give it all to God. Also, I always put in mind that life is short. Why burden yourself with too much hurt and anger for someone when you can take it all away by letting God take care of it di ba?
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Vince said:
oo nga, why burden yourslef when talaga namang di naitn kaya pag wala si Lord. Recognizing our humanness and dependence kay God, is the first wisdom, ika nga…. Hmm, basta pangako mo na kikibuin mo na si J, nakikita ko kasi na parang ako rin ay nasasaktan
drama hahaha! True.
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melai said:
Ang sa akin lang naman don’t push yourself …kung hindi ka pa handa bakit kailangang pilitin, time will heal the wounds which the other party had created, hindi masama yung manahimik na muna at hindi hayagang magpatawad basta ba hindi ka nahihirapan dahil ang galit sa ibang tao nakakapagpaliit ng sariling mundo yan
GOD knows and he understand what you feel, pero ikaw bilang malapit ng maging alagad ng DIYOS alam mong GOD will lead the way to forgiveness 
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Vince said:
I agree, Ate Melai… hinay-hinay nga…Pero I’m anxious na bukas na pala iyun! I thought next week pa. di bale, I need my own space mamyang gabi, Skinny dipping uli para fresh bukas.
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sasha said:
Psst, kuya, literal ba yang skinny dipping na yan ha? hehe
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bonnieq said:
Oh, Vince, I am so humbled by your words and your thoughts of me. A friend of 40+ years once said of me, “You so easily forgive the worst things. I don’t think I could do that.” By the grace of God go I, for I recall as a child being taught in church that if we don’t forgive, then God won’t forgive us. In light of my childhood, I wanted everything God and Jesus offer, paradise where there is no pain and abuse and illnesses: just peace and love. Well, it seemed to me that I must forgive or not be forgiven.
The other thing that has made it easy to forgive even the worst things is knowing that we all share the same enemy, even the perpetrators; who were victims long before I was a thought in someone’s mind. So, I see past the person to see Satan standing behind them, goading and tormenting them, and through them he strikes at me. So, I battle our common enemy instead of my fellow mankind, for whom I pray.
We all are in this giant classroom called earth and, in order to find our way back to our heavenly Father, we are tried in earth’s furnace until God can see Himself in us. Thus, I feel that we should focus on acing the tests that come our way.
See everyone as no different than you, Vince; no better and no worse: for as God said, “There is not one sin greater than another, save blasphemy.” So, you see a liar is no better than a murderer or rapist or pedophile and so forth. In some way or another, we’ve all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. Repentence is our key to redemption and glory.
Thank you so much for letting me know that I have said something that, in some way, might have helped you in your walk with Christ. As your sister-in-Christ, I am here for you; just a blog away.
Much love in Christ,
BonnieQ
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Vince said:
hahaha! E ano ngayon?
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Vince said:
Same here Ma’am BonnieQ. Widsh you all the best in life that others may follow too. “Martyr” originally known as “witness.” We can all be Martyrs, in our little ways. Wish you all the best!
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jhay said:
Forgiveness is a reminder we’re still human, accepting not our neighbor’s shortcomings but our own as well. Ang drama no? hehehe
Magpatawad, at ika’y papatawarin din. Ganoong kasimple lang.
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Vince said:
Hahaha! tnx Jhay, simple but thats the difficult and true to heart thing na di natin nagagawa most of the time…
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Forgive and Forget | The Itinerant's Path said:
[...] recollection with Fr. Rey, DCK as the facilitator. He was talking about lent, and a topic about forgive and forget was discussed. At the corner of my mind, I wanted to deny the essence of the discussion, [...]